The Bachelorette Week 8 - Hometowns with Hannah Brown

Hannah goes to the requisite four hometowns this week and first up (The Safe Spot) is Peter from Westlake Village, CA. He picks Hannah up in his sweet Mercedes and Hannah goes digging for clues about Peter. She finds a condom in his console and they have a flirty laugh over it, when in reality a burning hot car parked in the SoCal heat is not any place to keep a prophylactic you want to actually protect your Peter or prevent little Peters. Then they hop in Peter's sweet prop plane and fly over one of the most famous sites in the LA area, THE Bachelor Mansion. Later that day Hannah meets the fam for some Cuban food. Before chowing down, thought, they shout a German prayer at her. Just like the prayer stomps all over the meal, so have the German genes in the family stomped over anything that might have clued us into the fact that Peter is part Cuban.

During family talk time, Hannah tells dad her feelings are on track and tells mom that she wouldn't have let Peter invest this much in the relationship if she didn't still see a possible future with him. Peter tells his mom he's "there" with Hannah and begins using a catchphrase Bachelor Nation hasn't heard in a season or two and says he's "found my person."

At the end of the night during the time you're supposed to tell The Bachelorette "I love you," Peter can't quite get the words out, but he has no trouble getting smooches out. He begins the sentence, "I'm... ... ... so happy with where we're at." Oooh. So close. He tells the camera he's too scared to drop the L Bomb.

In Jupiter, FL, Tyler and Hannah go boating, which mostly entails making sure the other's body is sufficiently lathered up with sunscreen. Tyler also shows the waterfront house his family had to give up when his dad went bust. The big focus of the date is on Tyler's dad's medical condition, that happened just before he left. Ty hasn't even seen his dad since the show started filming. Tyler and Hannah head to the family house, which by all appearances is a good indication that dad is back on top financially. He's also mostly back on top medically. Tyler's brothers tell Hannah that after dad's illness Tyler had to step up and run the business, run the family, etc. and it sobered him up and now he's ready to be engaged. Tyler can only manage to tell Hannah "I'm falling in love with you." Oooh. So close. Shes 0-2. But fear not....

Luke is up next and in Gainsville, GA there is no sinful sunscreen rubbin' or console condoms. Luke and Hannah head straight for Bible study at the local Cracker Barrel knock off. Hannah is hoping that she meets people who, unlike Luke, can put together a full coherent sentence about what exactly his deal is, and complete the puzzle of what makes Luke Luke. His Bible study friends "affirm the good" Hannah sees in Luke. And I get it, who isn't better/cooler/funnier/nicer around their friends? Maybe Luke is one of those people. I mean, going back to something he said a few episodes ago, after seeing his hometown, everybody DOES like him! Now we know why he was so shocked the other dudes in the house didn't!

But there is still something creepy about Luke's hometown. It's like in a movie when the main character stumbles upon a seemingly idyllic town and everyone's like "Join us! You'll be happy here! Everybody is happy here!" See: Stepford (as in Wives) or Specter, Alabama (hey!) in Big Fish. But, *Spoiler* there's a big twist and it's a town full of weird psychos!

When Luke talks to his dad it's weird and stalkery, like he's entitled to Hannah. Or she's betrothed to him. And dad reaffirms those feelings! Someone tell Luke, "No!" Luke has no problem saying the L Word at the end of the evening. Hannah gets "flutteries." She's admittedly shocked they had one entire good day where Luke appeared to act like a real human. Hannah tells the camera she's falling in love with him.

Who would've thought Jed would be in the 4th position aka The Trouble Spot? In Knoxville, he's got a "surprise" for her, but it's not really a surprise for anyone who has been around Jed for longer than 5 minutes, because Surprise! we're going to play guitar and write a song in a recording studio. The song makes liberal use of the word "cobblestone" and Jed drops the L Bomb right then and there, WAY before the SUV shows up to whisk Hannah away at the end of the night.

Jed explains later to his family that they've talked about it and she's fine with music as his career. Jed's bitchy mom is cynical about the show (there's one every season.... "Oh, he's one of thirty and you've told them all that you love them") and about Hannah's commitment to Jed's Sparkle Motion. Mom really downsells Jed to Hannah making sure to mention that he's on a different path than one that leads to marriage right now. He doesn't have a degree. He's never had a real job. Jed's sis doubles down and straight up tells Hannah falling in love with her is not a good thing for his music.

At the Rose Ceremony, Peter and Tyler get roses immediately. Then Hannah has a panic attack when she's forced to choose between Jed and Luke and needs some classic Chris Harrison Counseling (CCHC). Really? Jed vs. Luke? Luke seems like a shoe-in after the visit with Jed's family, but maybe she's actually considering ALL of her time overall with Luke rather than one good day of human interaction. The guys once again assure the last man standing against Luke that this time he's DEFINITELY done.

Hannah says she doesn't feel done with either relatioship and isn't ready for either to end, even though tough decisions like that ARE THE SHOW. Chris Harrison enters the ceremonial room and delivers not only the heaviest of sighs, sighing for all of Bachelor Nation, but also an extra rose. The guys are, again, infinitely bummed that Luke has lived to see another rose.

So, does this mean 4 Fantasy Suites? How many actual windmills are there in Greece? Will Hannah actually send Luke packing? We'll have to wait. THAT'S THE SHOW.

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